this one goes out to the one i loved....

i woke up this morning with unbearable headache simply because i cried myself to sleep. how do i begin to retell the conversation i had yesterday with him? i don't know. i'm thinking of just forgetting all about it, like it never happened.

but reality just hit me...too damn hard! is this what i want to happen in my married life? can i just take in all the insults and never talk back? until when am i going to let it all pass?

the thing is...i don't even know now what i want to think about "US". should i decide now like it is "take it or leave it" segment of a show? this is my life. and i do not want to end up regretting the choices i will make now just because someone wants me to decide about something for his own peace of mind.

i couldn't imagine that i reached this ripe age of 30 and still confused whether i will plunge into the bandwagon just for the sake of telling the whole world that ..."hey, i'm getting married!"

of course, i want to get married. it's just not yet the right time for me. maybe others will think that, what is she waiting for? ahmm..the right man chosen by GOD for me.

it's sad that we have to end up like this. hurting each other with words we couldn't even think of saying before. but maybe like what u've said..."people change. " I could just wish that we didn't.....